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February 25, 2007

"Our Gift"

Am I ready to accept my gift?

Kids are the best gift that any woman can have. The only issue being
whether we are ready to accept this gift.

They call the earth "Mother Earth." Why?
Because she gives of herself in every possible way. She gives when you
ask for it and she gives when you don't ask for it.
She bears our burden gives us space to build upon.
She provides us with grains, fruits, flowers . you name it she offers
it and does so beautifully.
She provides us with beautiful landscapes, valleys, mountains, hills
and so much more to explore, to travel upon when we need to.
She provides us with jewels, gems, precious stones to adorn us.
She provides us with beautiful trees that sustain us, that provide
oxygen for us to breathe.
As our Earth is a Mother, so are we chosen to be Mothers. Why?

Because we are able to share in the beautiful process of creation.
Because we can nourish a life, sustain it.
Because we give of ourselves, our energy, our time, our love, our support.

But, we can only do all this when we are ready from inside, when we
are ready to accept our gift, wholeheartedly.

Having a child changes our life, there is no denying this. But it is
in our hands to keep this change positive. Yes, there are sleepless
nights, increased expenses and less time for yourself. All of a
sudden you are a mature adult looking after a child.

Tell yourself I will manage if I want to. I will take the changes as
they come. So maybe at times I will be tired; I am only human. But I
am ready to give it my best effort; it's all for my very own child.

Just like Mother Earth, we too have the capacity to to be there when
we are needed. We have the strength to bear life and to sustain it.
So be proud of yourself.

By Nusrat Malak

Finding Meaning and Joy As A Single Mother

Though we have barely enough time to focus on ourselves, I have been
finding joy in the in between moments of each day. Watching the water
splash out of the bath tub, knowing I will have clean up the water
fight the boys are having and remembering - "Someday I am going to
miss this." The frustrations are many but I remind myself to think
about the future, when they are grown and living lives of their own.

Weathering the difficulties of single motherhood means we are growing
too. Like our children, it is happening to us fast; so fast we may
not be seeing our progress.

I have watched myself grow for the past four years, having left a bad
relationship, with no job, no hope and a second child on the way. I
believed my life was doomed for some untold reason and that these two
children were a blessing perhaps I did not deserve.

Now, four years later I can see that the blessing was all of the pain
I have had to feel, heal, and move through. The scars of my struggle
are the shining wounds of a warrior who went to battle against all
odds to nurture and protect her children ... and I have won.

Though the outside world has not changed very much, our home and our
daily lives are chaotic and peaceful in their own right. I have come
to accept where we are. We are closer to poor that rich for now, but
we are far richer than those families I see whose lives have never
been turned upside down for survival and safety. And somehow, I
managed to keep it together: be completely sober, stronger, older,
wiser and less afraid of anything that comes our way.

My boys are now 7 and 3, and we are making it with the help of family
and friends. We are also propelled by the energy of preservation from
the Universe, the one that keeps the flower tight in the bud and safe
on the coldest night and tells it when it is time to gently open up,
and share its true beauty with the world.

by Christina Ciani